Last year, on Mother’s Day, I posted a quote from Elizabeth Stone:
“Making the decision to have a child – it is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.”
It is terrifying – loving another human being the way you love your child; you give them the power to hurt you deeply.
Losing Brody – it feels like we’ve lost everything. I know we haven’t. I know we still have so much. But I poured my love, my faith, my dreams, my heart into that little boy. That’s what a mother does. I poured everything into that little boy and it wasn’t enough. I lost him – I lost my everything.
The hardest part is accepting that I can no longer fight for him. I have so much left I want to give him. He was worth it. But there is nothing I can give him now.
But I don’t want this loss to cripple me as a mother. I don’t want it to feed anger and fear. My commitment as a mom is to keep loving, keep being patient, kind, forgiving and brave, even when it looks like my only reward will be hurt.
Faith is deciding that no matter how dark it gets, I will still be a light.
Happy Mother’s Day to all of you brave moms. It’s still worth it.